Break free from the Past and Reclaim your life

When it comes to Trauma, Depression, Anxiety, and any and all of their cousins within the mental health world, there is an internal divide. Part of you wants a swarm of people to come swooping in to the rescue, erasing the pain, overwhelm and loss. Whereas the other part of you hopes to God no one sees this part of you.

I have struggled in the hurricane, survival wasteland of mental health (or lack there of) for the large majority of my life. I have tried several types of therapies, including but not limited to talk therapy, a specified PTSD therapy, EMDR, the age old “Tough It Out”, Affirmations, “Act the way you want to feel and eventually you will feel the way you are acting”. They all end the same way. Exhaustion, self-deprecation, spiraling.

This is due to the lack of core work. All of these things are taking care of what is in the here and now. Sure we are discussing the past but we aren’t dealing with it. At first, the touchy feely, sit with my inner children sounded like a Earth Mother tribute I was not prepared for. Just not the way I’m wired. However, I was willing to try anything to feel better, to feel whole, to feel less dead inside. (Almost took a trip to experiment with LSD just to get something to work.)

This program gets to your core. It hurts, it’s hard, it opens up parts of yourself you have worked extremely hard to close off and forget. But once you start, once you begin to feel the release of pain, loss, self-hate; a new you emerges. A you that has been dying to escape and live your best life.

At the start of this program, they tell you they are here to hold you until you can hold yourself. I thought this to be a selling line. One similar to a great many I have heard before. However, they mean it. They hold you; they carry you, they sit with you in this darkness and keep a candle lit. I’ve never had something like this before. So many times, I was told that I had to do the work if I wanted to feel better and if I wasn’t feeling better I wasn’t doing the work. It was all on me. The pain, trauma, abuse, mess that was my life created by all those around me was my mess to clean up all alone. But this program and these women stepped in and said they couldn’t take the journey for me, but they sure as hell would clear a path, hold my hand and pick me up when I needed it because they wanted my healing as much as I did.

Jana has a past all her own, as we all do. However, even in the life sufferings that she was enduring in our time practicing together she was there. She was there for MY benefit. MY Success. MY Healing. During the program my world became extremely dark. Darker than I believe it ever has before. I thought about giving up. Throwing in the towel. I couldn’t heal now. I could never get through this, over this. I would forever be plagued by my history, and I needed to just figure out how to deal with that.

Against my every thought, feeling, and historical memory I did the one thing they told me to do that I believed would never work. I reached out. I told them what was happening. I shared my pain, my fear, my darkness with them thinking the response would be try harder. Keep going. If you want this badly enough you will find a way. Instead, I was greeted with sympathy. Understanding. And for the first time in my life a hand to hold through this. A hand that told me this healing was possible. A hand that said, “I will walk with you until you can walk alone.” Jana escorted me through the program. Jana didn’t leave me alone. She watched my transformation. She offered support, love, affirmation. And after it is all said and done, she’s still here for me. Still a sounding board. A support. A candle that doesn’t flicker in all the darkness of this work. She has taken part in the great changing of my life and the way I see my life and I will forever be grateful.

Jana is fantastic! Super patient with all of my questions. The drama cycle was pretty eye opening. It’s fascinating how things just come out of your mouth that you were never even aware of.

Jana is amazing and very personable. Makes it easy to open up and be vulnerable.

The times that I have done the clearings 1:1 with Jana were so very powerful!! Thank you, Jana